My husband is definitely more romantic than I am. And apparently, he’s not the only guy. What’s more, in the romance department ladies, that guy you might love to tease about being so unromantic, is quite possibly more romantically inclined than you as well.
The reason I thought about this at all is because we’re coming up to Father’s Day and in our case, my husband’s birthday just a few days before that. Do you remember that post that I wrote, called Mother’s Day and the Gift of Time? I was saying how having to go through Mother’s Day recognitions at church always felt weird and awkward to me. Well here’s the thing, I feel that way about every holiday. When the kids were little, Christmas was a blast only because I loved hauling out the decorations and doing up the tree. But celebrations in general…..well, life would go on without them very comfortably, is my feeling
Fatherhood, birthdays and romance! Oh my!
Does that sound weird? Anyway, the point is that here I am, facing a CELEBRATION of fatherhood AND the birthday of the wonderful guy that I’ve been married to for 42 years and I got nothing. No excitement, just a sense of get’er done. Isn’t that awful? Even as I wrote those words down I could see how dreary and unloving that sounds.
Sorry dear ladies, but the studies indicate…..
But here’s the thing and as I hinted in the beginning, according to actual studies, in general, men have been found to be more romantic than women. Based on a sliding ‘Romantic Beliefs Scale’, researchers found that 48% of men claimed to have fallen in love at first sight compared to only 28% of women. Reading that made me feel a lot better let me tell you. I always chalked it up to being annoyed at being the one who gets to arrange for and then clean up the aftermath of holidays and that it kind of spilled over into other things. Like birthdays for example.
It’s good to do what all over the place?
But lo and behold, it actually has it’s basis in the evolutionary process! Because men had less investment in the child rearing and so often fathered numerous children, it was safe and perhaps good for the species, to just have relationships all over the place. So they could follow their hearts and everything else, with little downsides.
So who is more romantic or is it really all about risk management?
Whereas a woman who would be pregnant for 9 months and then raising that kid for however long, had a bigger investment in time at risk. So she was inclined to not follow her heart so much, but to take the ‘measure of the man’ a little more seriously. Because of her reliance on a provider/protector, it wasn’t an advantage to be more romantic than him. Who would have thought eh?
So that’s the scoop on who’s more romantic! Isn’t it great when you can come up with a legitimate excuse for a touch of angst that makes you feel like you’re out of step with everyone else? “I can’t help it, this is just the way I am!” Works for me.
Pragmatism and romance, which one wins? Help me!
Granted, some of you ladies are more romantic and we love you even if you do make us look bad. But for those of us who struggle between pragmatism (who’s gonna clean all that stuff up?) and romanticism (I love my guy and love to think of creative ways to show him!), what’s the answer? Or maybe it boils down to a question of how many shirts can you give one guy and still have it look loving instead of lazy. In all honesty, I haven’t quite figured this one out.
Are Great Big Ribbons More Romantic?
As I’ve been writing this last part, an image pops into my head. That special love, coming through the door after a hard day at work. And waiting for him, wearing only a great big ribbon (in a favourite colour of course) is his lady love. I’m pretty sure that would work for them, but some of us might find that a little weird. Not to mention drafty. There have got to be other possibilities that don’t include great big ribbons or more shirts!
Suggestions ladies! Suggestions please!
Listen, I’m romantically challenged. I admit it. That’s why you need to give me some suggestions. As wives and lovers, how do you show your wonderful guy that you think he’s wonderful? And remember, we’re not looking for world class displays of ground-breaking, multi-day partying with decorations that overflow into the streets of our communities……We’re just looking for ideas that will fit easily into the routines that already fill our days. What are the little things that you’ve thought of? What do you do for that sweet guy ( who may or may not be more romantic than you realize), that gives him the very clear message that you find him absolutely adorable?
Share your thoughts, love to hear….
….. I’d love to hear what you’ve got to say! So share your thoughts and let me know what you think. In the meantime, be safe, be kind and enjoy your day wherever you are!
As always, I will remind you that I’m not a medical doctor. I’ve spent the last 20 years focusing on and learning to ‘grow’ my own health however. And that’s what I’m sharing here. All of it based on my own experiences and also the things that I’ve learned from the real experts! Those are the researchers and doctors who’ve seen the actual patients, worked in the labs and write the medical reports that are sprinkled throughout these posts.
My goal is to motivate and help you find your best way to live a healthier and more peaceful life. I and Ageless at Sixty cannot be held liable for any resulting injury or adverse change in health status.
I also advise that any changes that might affect your health status be checked with your accredited physician. This would include changes to your exercise routines and any medications you might be taking or other supplements.
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